In a Valley…persuing Limitless Life

I have been in a valley for a long time. I don’t think there have been any sheep there. I haven’t been able to see beyond myself, my worries, mental and physical pain. I have not been able to see beyond circumstances. I have stressed people who love me and people who don’t. I have not slept well. I have struggled to stay in the life giving Word of God. Paralyzed in my situation, not moving in any direction just panicking like a person in deep water not knowing how to swim I have grabbed for anything around me to prevent me from sinking. But I did sink into anger.

Still able to work with patients, I was not treating my peers well. And then God opened a door for change. That door looked like a bottomless pit at the time. On that Friday, I was called out and made to be accountable for my attitude at work and I had a weekend to think through some options to improve the situation. I was reassured that my care to patients was not in question but I was not being nice to the people I work with and that I appeared to be overwhelmed with stress. I was afraid of losing the only thing that seemed to give me purpose, work. My heart sank to one of the lowest places it could go – afraid, alone, worthless & crazy labels reinforced again. Angry tears flowed and my thoughts ran rampant. There was a George Bailey moment here – my kids, family, friends, work and just the entire world would be a better place if I could just disappear. I sulked and fussed at God till I was empty. And then I sat still and God began to speak. Like waves echoing & rolling up on the beach God reminded me I was not alone. I was made for a purpose. He has a plan and a future for me. He loves me. He loves me. He LOVES me with an everlasting perfect love – not like people on earth but for eternity. So I sat in my valley and let Gods waves of love and truth work.

Here I am several weeks later. That weekend went from yelling at God to seeking Him.God is faithful. He does not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able to bear…He provides a way of escape! My role at work has changed. I get to have routine hours four days a week. I am grateful for less responsibility. I am going back to school in the fall to finish my Bachelors. I have wise counsel and I know God loves me. I know He has labeled me Courageous and Free and life in Him is Limitless!

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7 thoughts on “In a Valley…persuing Limitless Life

  1. Kristi Seat

    Yay!!! Go God! Praying that God will continue to bless you and allow you to walk into more freedom as you step out of those dark places. Those difficult times hurt but God is there and He is transforming you into a woman whose story can light the way for others.

    Blessings!
    Kristi Seat
    P31OBS Ministry Team

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  2. Becky

    Thank you for sharing your story. We get so caught up in the darkness that we can miss His light! Glad you saw it and He is leading you daily.

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  3. Sandi Brewer~~P31 Ministry Team Volunteer

    I appreciate your honesty about the valley you have been through. This job you have is your sheep, you know. It is the sphere of influence God has placed you in and He is working in you and through you! I praise God that He used that weekend to breathe the truth of His love into you and show you that He truly is what you need most in life. Thank you for sharing in such an open way–your stosry blessed me and I know it will bless others.

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  4. sabrinaebert

    May God continue to show a you where He wants you to be. It is perfectly okay to yell and let your feelings be known, God pours grace into a broken heart as Derwin says and the healing process begins. Stay blessed and faithful, rejoice in Him and He will give you the desires of your heart.

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  5. bloggerlovestheking

    Thanks for sharing your heart today. May God continue to fill you with His love for yourself and those around you. Derwin Gray told us in the conference call to look at others and think Jesus died on the cross for that person. He loves us all and wants us to love all in return. Blessings. Debbie W. (Proverbs 31 Ministry OBS Team)

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  6. Satisfied By Love

    I live the visual of being able to stand up under temptation and the knowledge that he gives us a way out. This was a great reminder for me today…thank you.

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  7. bevfranklin

    A talent from the King!! You are an eloquent writer with your heart wide open as you write! Praying He continues to lead you out of the valley. You are an amazing woman! xoxo

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